Terrrible Stories is I guess, a microfiction blog? Flashfiction? Created by one writer with lots of unpublished work trying to make something of him/her/itself on the internet. Because we all know the internet are where dreams go to die or be reborn, only to die again in a fire blaze from all the hate from people who know nothing! I’m looking at you Gary. You uncultured swine. Come for the laughs. Come to cry. But mostly come with an open mind and remember there is no spoon. Only- hey, look some cereal. I’m gonna eat it. Shit. I don’t have a spoon. Do you by chance have a spoon? You don’t? That’s too bad. It’s going to get all soggy now. Oh well, back to this about page thing.
Where did I leave off? OH, yes. So I like writing and just decided to start doing this on a whim, and a suggestion from a friend. Have fun, and… There was something else.. yes! Check out the Terrrible twitter! On the twitter you’ll find stuff and things. There may also be a badger. He isn’t very friendly. He ate my sand witch the other day. Okay I’m lying there is no badger. I only said that to maybe entice you into following the twitter. I ate the sandwich. It was good. Cumbers, tomatoes, Sriracha sauce wrapped in a tortilla. Huh, that is a wrap? I guess you’re right non-existent fan that I’m talking to.
I’ve come a to a sudden and violent realization. You’re not real. I’m just talking with myself. My whole life is a lie. I’m just going to curl up in the position now and cry. Enjoy the stories and remember to share this blog with your friends, family, significant other/girlfriend/boyfriend, daughter, son, father, mother, father-in-law, mother-in-law, step brother, step son, step daughter, teacher, friend you haven’t spoken to in years and is possibly dead for all you know, your local drug addict, your local drug dealer, Steve from down the street (we all know he’s a bit of a dick, but he makes a mean potato salad so we invite him to all the potlucks), your neighbors, your mailman, your mechanic, that guy/gal who you think is cute at that large warehouse sized department store but are too afraid to ask out due to the fear of being rejected, your boss, your boss’s boss, your boss’s boss’s boss, the cute IT guy/gal you hope is working today because your having issues with your workstation and he/she has a nice butt, the ugly IT worker who has gross acne all over his/her face and a nose the size of a small car, your sister, Chairman of the Defense Policy Board Advisory Committee John J. Hamre, Chairman of the Defense Policy Board Advisory Committee John J. Hamre’s family, Chairman of the Defense Policy Board Advisory Committee John J. Hamre’s friends, Chairman of the Defense Policy Board Advisory Committee John J. Hamre’s enemies, The President of the United States Barack Obama, The First Lady of the United States Michelle Obama, The Queen of England Elizabeth Alexandra Mary, The Queen of England Elizabeth Alexandra Mary’s family, The Queen of England Elizabeth Alexandra Mary’s friends, The Queen of England Elizabeth Alexandra Mary’s enemies, The Queen of England Elizabeth Alexandra Mary’s ancestors, Ewan McGregor, Ewan McGregor’s family, Ewan McGregor’s friends, Ewan McGregor’s enemies, Ewan McGregor’s neighbors, The French, The Chinese, The Japanese, and after you have introduced it to all those people remember to go fuck yourself. You self centered piece of shit. My god. Look at all those people you know! How to do you maintain all those relationships? That’s got to be a couple billion people right there. And you know all of them? You lying sack of shit. You hairy, sweaty ball-sack you. I hope you find some real friends because none of them are. You narcissistic whale. I say good day. I said good day! Remember to like, share, and follow for more Terrrible Stories you beautiful sundried snowflake.